Dating Outside Your Age Bracket - I Married an Older Man - AmandaMuseIs that wrong? Go to Page Please register to participate in our discussions with 2 million other members - it's free and quick! Some forums can only be seen by registered members. My girlfriend and I have been dating for 2 years, and I could honestly say that I've never been so happy with someone before.
The reason I asked this question about me being "okay" with dating an older woman, was reading a okcupid research article saying how most men compete for younger women, and there were guys in the comment section saying things like "Yeah if you can't get a younger woman its because you got priced out and you suck" I tried to not let it bother me but it did. That as a statistic men chase younger women, and dating an older woman is looked upon as failing to be able to compete with other men.
So far so good.Dr. Drew on dealing with a dating age gap
He's not concerned about the difference at all. If you two really gel as a couple then people won't see a 5 year difference in your ages. Yeah, I think you're probably too immature for this relationship, dude.
Okay wait, you are making life decisions based on the internets comments section of a dating site article? Oh honey. Cut this shit out. Anyway, in my early-mid 30s I dated a guy very seriously for several years who was about four years younger. The reasons it didn't work out had nothing to do with our age gap. Here's where it could potentially become an issue - if she wants to have children, she is facing a much steeper timeline than you are right now in life. Where two twentysomethings can wait and see where things go, maybe get married, maybe think about kids when it feels right - a couple in their 30's do have to face the reality that female fertility starts declining after So if you don't think you want kids in the next 10 years, and she does -- the relationship can't work in the long run.
It sounds from your question and followups that you're focusing on a lot of superficial externals about how it might affect you rather than the heart of the matter - what is she looking for in you? Gwyneth Paltrow is five years older than Chris Martin.
I don't think there's anything wrong with you. I know if I were in her year-old shoes I would want to know if I was seeing someone who used the word "cougar" seriously in any non-feline context, let alone applied to how others might view our relationship, has no problem with a double standard, i. If she doesn't know, I suggest you tell her. She might chose to make this a non-issue for you. Re your question: A 26 year old guy, dating a 31 year old woman, is it okay?
I think it's just fine if a 26 year old man is dating a 31 year old woman.
But, if we're talking about a 26 year old guyI'm not so sure. Just noticed that 15 comments have been posted since I started writing. I'm betting that I'm not the only one who is giving you grief about this question. Who do you want to date?
Her or other men? It's a fine age gap for anyone. Best of luck -- you're gonna need it.
Don't Be the Worst: How to Date Outside Your Age Range
I tried to not let it bother me but it did. OK, I'm here to tell you: lots of things get "looked upon as failings.
My girlfriend and I have been dating for 2 years, and I could honestly say that I've never been so happy with someone before. We are getting. A 26 year old guy, dating a 31 year old woman, is it okay? Hey guys We met when he was in his senior year of college and 22 and I was Opinion: The danger of dating year old women - Evewoman Thus, as soon as she gets her first job and her money, many women want to prove to a man.
You know the saying, "Haters gonna hate"? There you go. You, sincere internet stranger who is making a valiant effort to figure this out, are not a statistic.
You may plug into some venn diagrams every once in a while, but the value judgements you make for your own time in life need not be unduly influenced by lying numbers or hype and spin or anything other than your own notion of where the ship you and only you are steering is headed. It is weird in the sense that it's not typical and it is something some people might look down on you for. Does that make it bad or a bad idea?
I don't think so, but that's your decision to make. What people might think of you as a couple is just one of many factors that go into deciding whether to pursue a specific relationship. It's not wrong to consider it, either, but talking about it in this particular way reinforces a lot of gross sexist norms so I suggest not bringing it up like this around other people or around this woman.
Why do you care what's "normal"? Why do you care what other people think about your prospective relationship, or what they might think about you on the basis of who you date? While it's natural to wonder about the various consequences of a difference in age, I think your would-be sweetheart might be a bit taken aback to learn that you had to ask the Internet whether dating her would be "OK.
Then of course there's the unnecessary stereotype that her being over 30 for five minutes means she is now turning at least some of her attention to baby-planning. They haven't even gone on a date. I don't think kids need to be a factor in the dating process quite yet. I'm 26 years old and I've dated a number of women in their late 30s in the last few years.
It's never been any kind of issue. On the other hand, at the tender age of 26 I think of myself as a grown man and I wouldn't lower myself to taking advice from a bunch of bros in the comment section of a dating website so maybe our experiences are very different.
For what it's worth - not much, by the way - some women my own age have told me that the fact that I was dating a 40 year old raised their opinion if me. But you should not be using the identity of the person you date as a status symbol because it's repulsive.
I've discussed dating out of your demographic with men and women alike, than some weird year-old, standing next to a television set going, "Hey, I know this because I once worked with a year-old man who was.
Someone 5 years older than you is not old enough to be your mother, so "MILF" seems quite a bit off. My sister-in-law and my ex-sister-in-law are both five or six years older than my brother, and I don't think either relationship has had, or had, any issues relating to their age difference. I don't know what to say about your apparent internalized belief that men "should be" older than their female partners or they'll lose status, except a it's certainly a widespread cultural meme in lots of places, and b in my experience, cultural memes like that are usually obstacles to creating relationships that work for you, not for random TV gossip shows or shock jocks or whoever.
Since you are asking, and given the words you chose, she is too old for you. Older women tend to respect themselves more and have higher standards. In that sense dating an older woman reflects well on you. Older women, because of their confidence and experience, also make better lovers. I would really encourage you to disabuse yourself of the subconscious misogyny you've indicated in your post and follow-ups so that you can be worthy of her interest.
Plutarch, in his biography of Marc Antony, remarks that Cleopatra met Antony "at the very time when women have the most brilliant beauty. Notwithstanding, what are YOU comfortable with? And the line about not able to attract a younger woman.
Hollywood or something? You fall in love with whom you fall in love with. When I was 34 I was dating a 27 year old. We had a lot of fun in the time we were together. Our work was similar, we liked the same movies, the same books, we had the same political views, our musical tastes overlapped. Eventually he was transferred to another city and that was that, but we had a terrific time.
No one, including the two of us, gave any thought to the age difference, because it was never evident. I am eight years older than my husband, and our respective ages have never been an issue between us.
So if someone is 30 years old, according to these rules, they should be dating people ranging from ages 22 – Men tend to stick to their own age as the maximum limit age they are willing to date, While the rule says that a year- old woman could date a year-old, most year-old women don't. I'm now 22 and he's coming In hindsight They say men mature slower than women anyways! 0 Currently my best friend who is 23 is dating a 38 year old!. However, she “could see the rule working out much better for men than women,” because “chances are a year-old man dating a year-old.
Except when he makes fun of 80s music. People have already given your grief for describing yourself as a 26 year old boy and caring about the opinion of an anonymous bunch of dudes on OKCupid, so I'll spare you on that front. My question is regardless of your concerns, how is anyone even going to know you are dating a 31 year old unless you tell them? Unless said women looks substantially older than 31 or you look substantially younger than 26, your age difference is unlikely to be identifiable by the general public that's making the rather generous assumption that anyone else is going to care.
Im 22, almost done with college, and I'm talking to a 28 year old guy. And while I prefer to date women my own age, if I meet someone who is 6 years younger. Older men often date younger women, but everyone can benefit when the age gap is reversed A year-old woman will have better luck messaging a year-old man I asked my friend Trevor, a year-old mathematician, what he made of it. are, they always have a little trouble taking life advice from a year-old. Physically you are 28 years old but mentally you could be younger (less Is it appropriate for a year-old man to date a year-old woman?.
I didn't marry any of them or anyone else for that matter but they -- well all but one -- were great relationships, the shortest of which lasted almost 2 years and the longest almost 8 years. I don't recall my age, or our age difference, being a factor. I primarily dated men younger than myself because those were the men that I happened to meet. I went to grad school at 31 and most of my classmates were years younger than I was.
When I got out and got my first internship, same deal. I had more in common with them then men my own age who were already well-established in their careers, etc. Most of the time we found out each others ages after we started dating and it just wasn't an issue for either of us.
I'm 29 and my girlfriend is It's great! There are lots of advantages to dating a grownup. I wouldn't trade her for a year-old for anything, especially when I remember what I was like at Also, did you read that OkCupid article, or just the comments? Because the article, if I'm thinking of the same one you are, was about how awesome women in their 30s are, and how dumb it is that guys don't tend to date older women. And they had data to back up something women being awesome! Honey, five years is an age gap when you are a child.
Five years doesn't rate as an age gap when you are an adult. I skipped to the end.
This must worry you for some reason, but it shouldn't. I remember a ton of lady-persons who were 31 at my 26 and I didn't give a rat's patoot about our respective ages. Be glad you've found someone you care about and who feels the same. I'm a 30 year old woman. I'd have no problem dating a 25 year old.
As the bard said, love the one you're with. If she's OK with you, you should be too. When I was in my early 30's, I had a short relationship with a woman in her early 20's. We weren't a good match and one of the things that stuck out to me was the difference in maturity. If you're thoughtful and mature and your are compatible, great, have a good time.
You haven't even asked her out. How difficult is it for them to date a younger man? What I found was kind of surprising. When men message women, women tend to respond most often to men around their own ages.
A year-old woman will have better luck messaging a year-old man than a year-old one, according to the data. And a year-old man is more likely to respond to a message from a year-old woman than a message from any other age group. When women make the first move, the age gap dating norm is reversed.
I asked my friend Trevor, a year-old mathematician, what he made of it. They have more interesting jobs and hobbies, and their profiles are just better … no stupid selfie-only profiles. Did that explain it? Across all ages, straight women write shorter profiles than straight men.
And then there are those year-old women who really clean up with the year-old dudes. Cindy has been dating men in their 20s for the past 15 years. Working in tech, she sometimes feels she has more in common with somethings than older men. When I spoke with women who message much younger men on OkCupid, most of them told me something similar. I have no desire to have a man telling how I should be conducting my life. But I have been on dates with guys some 10 years older, and my feelings are this: no matter how diplomatic and open-minded they are, they always have a little trouble taking life advice from a year-old.
This kind of culling is even easier now that dating sites let us whittle our options down to the year. I contend that as long as nobody is being willfully creepy I see you, guys in Ferrari hatsthis kind of limitation is mega lame. I know many smoking-hot middle-aged people who are emotional teenagers. True, another factor is judgment from other people, who may see a year-old going to dinner with a year-old and make judgments about which one of them is drowning in student loan debt.
Given the opportunity, your friends and strangers will judge you for being out with somebody who is too fat, too thin, to short, too Asian, too a stripper, whatever. It is up to you to be mutually happy with the person you date.
28 year old woman dating 22 year old man
I learned this from experience, but also from Ludacris. Admittedly, I prefer older guys, only because they tend to be fully fused, like a human skull. The idea that young people like older people because of the financial security is irritating.